A Self-Study Within A Broken Mind

I came back reluctantly, at odds with myself. My mind wavered between a blissful ignorance of the world going to shit and the stark panic that tortured my sleep. Maybe it was something else that tortured my sleep. I wanted it to be Garavand, in the dark of the room shifting me awake in the middle of the night as a joke to keep me tired, but it was far more likely to be some mouse looking for food in the winter times. Otherwise, it was my stressed mind, wondering what I could do to make enough money to keep a roof over my head in the coming months. Here I was again, at the device for entertainment, for work, just writing of my own insanity Part 3. I wanted it to be the final part, but seeing as Lila would be with me for years of my life, I felt this final arbitration of me would not be wrapped up here. Not to mention that I was still a part of Tarne, Lila’s child. I had to figure out a way to exist apart from her, though I had a feeling that I would always somehow exist within the confi...

Understandably, I had not been back for a few days. I had a lot of information to mull over, and having read it over just now, I decided to confront her. When I opened my eyes in the library, I was no longer in the library, but the garden Lila recreated from the story I provided. The green of the foliage was pleasant to look at, but I was still stuck in the body of a child born to Lila. There had to be a reason for it. When my view shifted, I fussed again to call attention to myself. There she was, standing over me. Rather than address me, she uncovered her chest and held my head close to her left nipple. I felt my stomach gurgle, and was sucking on her breast before I knew what was happening. “When you aren’t here, the baby is just a baby,” Lila said. I tried to pull away from the part of her inside my mouth, but the body wanted to drink more. “I know you’re back in, but I was just about to feed her, so enjoy feeling like a child again for the moment. Or are you perhaps getting hard t...

I came back a few days later, after trying to keep my attention on other things. Knowing more proved to be a step into madness I was not prepared for. Ideas still stopped by from the Infinity Void, most as I was trying to sleep. Some were X-rated, themed to the various stimuli I encountered on a daily basis. Others were stories that I would have liked to delve into, had I not been torn apart into other things from music to worrying about my future and the futility of my dreams in the changing world of a global pandemic. “Hello?” I asked in the emptiness of the library. The space was too big for just one person, even for two unless they had a lot on their minds. In reality this space was the common area of a library for a whole slew of students. While there, I read books of many stories I have now forgotten, though moments of romance and sexuality of them all remained seared to the back of my skull. One particular description of a girl masturbating excited me the most, as I marveled how...

I came back a week later, during the day for the first time in months. I wanted to have time in case Lila decided to tell me more about herself. Though I arrived at the library countless times before, this time I appeared in the small room underneath it in the small room at the heart of the creationism infection. There was nothing extra added to the space, but all four doors were open onto the darkness with a ceiling of the library slightly lit from within. There was no reason for the open areas since the vines creeping out from the central invisible mass could go through solid objects. It only took a sweeping motion to close them all. I had to wonder what this space meant, and just how big it could be. I worried that my creationism may impact the Infinity Void sourcing, but the giant mess of vines could very well be a small blotch in a very big space. There was still a ladder up to the library, not the grand spiral staircase there once was. The idea was scuttled by none other than the...

I returned into the spawn chamber to find it empty save for the open laptop with Crimmy and a countdown above her head that ticked away from twenty-three hours and ten minutes. The camera dildo was still inside her, so I assumed that beast was still playing somehow. “Where is he?” I asked Crimmy. She fidgeted and moaned as the thing inside her shifted. “He wanted to go full VR,” she said. “He’s still alive?” I asked in surprise. “Has he- how?” Crimmy smiled a wicked grin and pushed her opening further against the camera inside her. “He’s been naughty,” she said. “Wanna see?” I got flashes of possibilities from his echoes still inside me. “Not really,” I said. “Can you just pull him out?” Crimmy put a finger to her lips, licked it, then proceeded to touch her clitoris until she arched to an orgasm. “Huh,” she said after. “He won’t come out. He’s got those claws of his inside me. Guess you’ll have to go inside, huh?” She flicked the finger just used to get herself off to motion me ...