A Self-Study Within A Broken Mind

Here, a story of normal note would create a split to build suspense, but the fact of the matter is that everything was happening at the time of writing, even if it is read much later. I stood before myself in the doorway to the library. It was a blatant copy, voice and all, but I knew it was my own fault. Emptiness, much like a black hole in principle, wanted to fill itself. When given access to a rich database of information, it filled itself with that. I gave it a database, and in turn learned of a new, and much deeper sense of emptiness. “Please, don’t be alarmed,” it said. “That’s my voice,” I said. “You took my voice!” “I’m borrowing it,” it explained. “I didn’t have one before. I don’t know if I had anything before that illustrious moment of ‘let there be light’. I’m grateful to you, and wanted to say so.” “What in the fucking hell is happening right now?!” Lila exploded from behind me. “Who are you? What are you doing in untethered space? Are you like me? Are you like Jack? Why ...

I came back two days later, three if you count that it was almost two in the morning. I was in a different mindset following a mass layoff due to the virus affecting all businesses. I did not want the night to end because the next few days would not be easy. The essential jobs were likely to be the only form of income, but a lot of people would be unemployed until the virus died down. At the very least, I did not want to worry Lila about the things happening in my reality. I would get by somehow. As I entered the room under the library, I found her sleeping there on the couch. Maybe since I provided my day-night cycle, she aligned to it. I did not want to wake her. Her face looked so calm and I wanted to keep it that way. Rather than leave for the night, I went upstairs to see if the alchemy-magical circle she made in the floor had any success over the days I had been away. It became apparent that it did not capture the person in question, as the drawn strands of wood curved into a lot...

I returned reluctantly a few months later to that dark room. My goal was to continue the story on the laptop of how Rebecca escaped from captivity. I should be happy she got such an opportunity, but had been lost without her to entertain. It was obvious that I was seeking life in places where it was impossible, but she was a nice escape that I corrupted with my mind. This doesn’t flow. This target-less pen resists my motions. I have not written anything new in a while only revised and edited old work, two short stories. This was not enticing me to continue especially since a cool new story just struck my brain with lightning this morning. I sat in the dark of that room at the open computer only shedding light into the room when I wanted it to. When I picked up the laptop of endless battery, an arriving video call almost caused me to drop the damn thing. I watched the screen of two options as the tune played in the small enclosure. How? Who was this? It couldn’t have been her. She cut ...

Now at the new notebook, of shade green, I sat at my morning coffee pondering how I could best approach Rebecca’s space and talk to her rather than fight. I had this feeling that a duel was inevitable, a struggle between the two of us comparing who could better bend her space to their will. What could she do that I wasn’t prepared for? Did Crimmy, like beast, think up dark imagery of torture and torment for Rebecca? Time drew short before work, and if I was to be stuck in this space, this notebook, I’d have to resolve it quickly. With a sharp breath, I entered Rebecca’s space high above the neighborhood. She expanded the few houses to about thirty, and each had a light on while the sky was still dark. The realistic sun simulation mirrored my reality in darkness. I was without form, but thanks to the dumb child part of my mind, Rebecca was already aware that I was there. Hopefully, she had no idea where, but when the library house exploded, I knew that she was waiting there for me. It ...

I arrived at the library on the following Monday to find Rebecca sitting atop a bookshelf, overlooking the library. It took me a second to realize that it wasn’t really Rebecca but Shadowbecca. Dividing herself was a slippery slope to actually splitting her mind like me. She could create versions of herself to make certain things easier, but the danger came from the clones becoming self-realized. I decided to test the reality of these copies. I floated up and sat next to Shadowbecca. “Do you speak, or did Rebecca make you mute to make sure you could stealth around?” I asked, but no response came. Minutes passed as I waited for Rebecca to run in and force me between her legs to mingle our beasts, but nothing occurred. I drifted off into a memory of Tiarto’s story and pondered how I could bring him to the world stage. “I can speak,” Shadowbecca said, focusing me back to the library. I looked around, but it was just the two of us. What was Rebecca doing that was so important that she di...

“Luke?” I asked. The man walked closer and slipped out of his body to a green figure with an unnecessary sagging light penis in the front. “Uncle Kali is in the house!” he bellowed. A green light expanded from his body. He made about a hundred arcs of his own energy at once and slipped from visible light, but my specters could still pick him out. “So you fucked my sister, huh?” The pulses of anger were obvious, but I retaliated with some pride pulses. “I was human at the time,” I replied. “But yes, I had sex with your sister and we had a baby. His name is Filigare Agerist, and he’s a Zaxi just like I am now. Thanks to Doc, we are one and the same, brother.” I slipped out of the containment and back into my human skin. “We’re not brothers,” Luke said, sending angry pulses. “But Fil is my nephew.” He stopped feeding on himself and returned to visible light, still manifesting the saggy member. “Did Doc make you a better body?” I asked, avoiding looking at the green penis. Was it on purpos...