A Self-Study Within A Broken Mind

“I’m in love with you right now, it’s not even funny,” she said. Her hand touched my shoulder and she leaned close to whisper. “Anything you want, just tell me.” Saliva built in my mouth. It’s been a while since I ate, and she proved to be an especially difficult girl to unlock. The waiting improved the appetite, but wait too long and you die. I needed to survive. Her name was Samantha, a very basic name for very basic person. Human characteristics blended together when I was acting out of love. Samantha had been marinating in pheromones of joy for a week now. I have to be patient as she fully blossomed in love, enriching the threshold of flavors. It was a cruel game, but it was about my survival. She will live on after I fed, yet it would be a lonely existence, if I was to eat her heart. “Come closer,” I said. My mouth watered. No matter how many times I tried to starve myself, I ended up feeding again. My mom told me repeatedly that it wasn’t a burden, but a blessing. How did she man...

As soon as I entered that V-scape, a message popped up to greet me from the only person I’ve met there, Ledeon. As it had been upwards of a year since I'd last been in contact with him, it was a surprise. “Wow,” he said in the message. “You haven’t been on at all since I met you. I take it you didn’t like the Dark World?” A prompt popped up to reply, but I hesitated. When my eyes focused on the reply prompt, a text box popped open. It was speech recognition in the highest of forms. “I did,” I said, to myself in the middle of the town to compose a reply. “I was just dealing with a lot at home. A friend just had a baby, and this might be the last time I’m ever in this place. Honestly, I don’t even know what I’m doing here.” “Huh,” he replied. I expected more, but he didn’t send anything else until I was half of the way to the next town. With the green filter, the gray environment looked desolate, but beautiful. “Send me your location. I’ll show you the coolest parts of this V-scape b...

“Luke?” I asked. The man walked closer and slipped out of his body to a green figure with an unnecessary sagging light penis in the front. “Uncle Kali is in the house!” he bellowed. A green light expanded from his body. He made about a hundred arcs of his own energy at once and slipped from visible light, but my specters could still pick him out. “So you fucked my sister, huh?” The pulses of anger were obvious, but I retaliated with some pride pulses. “I was human at the time,” I replied. “But yes, I had sex with your sister and we had a baby. His name is Filigare Agerist, and he’s a Zaxi just like I am now. Thanks to Doc, we are one and the same, brother.” I slipped out of the containment and back into my human skin. “We’re not brothers,” Luke said, sending angry pulses. “But Fil is my nephew.” He stopped feeding on himself and returned to visible light, still manifesting the saggy member. “Did Doc make you a better body?” I asked, avoiding looking at the green penis. Was it on purpos...

Fiona was still around, but rather than meet with her I brought out some pictures I took of her glorious nudity on my archaic smartphone . I felt the imitated penis harden, but after a few minutes of pumping and stroking, I was getting nowhere. If I was no longer human why would Doc make such a detailed human body for me? “Can’t get off to my naked pics?” Fiona asked from behind me. I turned to her before realizing that she was naked. She guided my erection into herself without another word. “Bite my skin open, and I’ll bite yours, then we suck to get off. It’s like a forced release.” Her teeth broke my skin as pleasure flooded my system. In a way, this felt like sex, but was nowhere close. I missed the sweat, dirt, her scent, and all the things a human enjoyed being exposed to. When we were done, I pulled out the useless piece of flesh from within her human skin. She still had the same smell, but it didn’t impact my nose or brain the same. I ventured below to taste-test the candy gel...

The small black spot in visible white space was motionless until it exploded to encase me. It was a sort of tunnel that reminded me of the Dream Vestibule that Ernie took me into. Whatever happened to that guy? He was fun. He also mentioned JJ. Was that the flawless shroud , or the person who made that invisible cloak ? Did Ernie age out of his human skin? Was he a full Garavand now? Maybe I’d meet him later. The tunnel snapped shut around me until I was standing beside Fiona again in some virtual ‘scape of a tropical island. “What took you so long?” she asked. “Fear, mostly,” I replied. “Where are we?” “A virtual realism ‘scape,” she said. “One of the few Japanese islands that is not underwater yet. They just accepted that their country will eventually sink even with the desalination nation pulling water out, and began waterproofing everything. Now they have buildings half-underwater that sway with every tsunami and can operate like ships. Smart people adapt to unforgiving natu...