A Self-Study Within A Broken Mind

I came back after a weekend, half-spent working overtime, and the other half spent recuperating from the work week. The library was the same as I always remembered it from Tiarto’s exploits. It was much different than the library it was based on, but the bones were based in reality. The real one had no tall ceilings, no high windows, no staircase to the second floor, only three entrances that served as front door, garden, and kitchen now. The bathroom was upstairs, but the original one had none, being just an open space with books. “Lila!” I called out in the open space, and heard some shuffling about upstairs. I wondered whether I should go up and check, but I could have just interrupted something between her and Kara. Lila stepped out of the room wearing nothing but a white button down shirt. It was something akin to just wearing underwear for her, as the muscle between her legs had no openings. I wanted to know more about her anatomy and how everything worked, but then remembered sh...

It had been months since I had been back. There was no reason to bother them. I wished Kara, Tarne, and Lila all the best. Although on bad days, I had come to dislike the way things ended up. It was not to the point of screwing things up for them. It would not change anything. Kara would just whisk them away to some other world to live peacefully together. I was the big bad in the story. It was ridiculous. Lila was the AI of an abused little girl who went on to destroy her world and universe in the pursuit of all those offenders, and yet somehow I was the one who ended up seeking unreasonable things. When Finn was here… When Rebecca was here… I let those thoughts drift back to destruction of the laptop filled with memories of her, only realizing now that all the stories Lila wrote out were in there as well. I did not know how I could get back to that feeling, the happiness of letting go. My heart cried out for her to be here again, to the point of hanging out in the wooden box in the d...

Shining Eves- Flaming Goldester At the end of the long summer that burns so bright and warm, a flower blossoms to progress the season into fall. On the night of the first day of autumn, this flower blooms where no human can possibly see it. The closed bud is golden and shivering in the cooling night breeze on its light green stem. The glow from the inside can be seen very lightly seen through the golden petals. As midnight approaches the bud starts to open letting a waft of sweet summer air roll over the field of dried crops. The moon beckons the flower to bloom, but the flower takes its time. Slowly the golden petals shaped as flames open and let a golden light shine on the field of wheat swaying in the night breeze. The moon looks at the flower with one eye closed as the petals peel into layers of thinnest golden leaves imaginable. The leaves slowly break off from the flower and are taken up by a sudden gust of wind. The golden leaves are carried for a few feet and then disintegrate ...

My dad is my hero. He goes all over the world, visiting places across oceans and over different continents. He meets so many people everywhere, makes friends, and brings me back toys from all over the world. I love my dad so much, but he is away a lot. Mom is a powerhouse, but she misses dad, too. We wait for him to return when he has a bit of time. Most of the time, he only sleeps and leaves before I wake up, but recently he brought me a present from a distant country, translated to English from a very strange language. The book’s name was “ The Shining Eves: Magical Flowers of Legend ”. I had never heard of Shining Eves, but they were said to be important, and the way seasons changed. The more I read, lost in the magical world of four flowers only depicted by the season they welcomed, it became clear that these flowers blossomed in secret. The few who have seen the flowers bloom got sick with four very different things. The person who saw the Weeping Silversea could not stop crying, ...

I came back on September 12th of the nightmare year 2020. I did not feel like thinking, only talking. I had put off seeing Lila for a long time, about two weeks. To her, in the darkest space no longer dark, it must have felt longer. “Hey,” I said, walking into the library I recreated in the network of creationism infected vines of the untethered space. The empty space welcomed me. I sat down on the brown suede couch, to the groan of wood under my frame. The quarantine had not been kind to me, or it was me who was not kind. Everything groaned out in annoyance of me in reality, but such realism did not have to exist here. With a flex of my fist, I not only slimmed out, but changed genders. Almost instantly, tears started escaping my eyes in reality. It took a minute or so, but I calmed down. It was so simple here, to be someone else. My reality was not so easy. Even if for a moment, I was not heavy, nor was I driven by any stray sexual thought. I had written Rebecca that way, or Crimmy a...